The Frame
This is an interesting one. It takes so long to get where it's going, but is so passably adequate even before it's gotten there, that by the time it does…
Latest "Je nais se quois" files
The Frame
The Radleys
Pretty decent English modern-vampire-movie-played-almost-as-drama a lá "The Hamiltons". This was pretty decent though. Modern English vampire family deals with internal politics and trying to survive without being found out in…
Sorry I Killed You
This movie is pretty sophomoric. Dick jokes (including a huge rubber dildo that appears more than once), insecurity about males being mistaken for being gay, and every imaginable prank that…
Ankle Biters (2021)
I can't believe it. Somebody actually made a "horror comedy" that works watchably well as both. I have never seen a film that is so charming and so grisly at…
Beyond the Sky
Surprisingly ok sci-fi special effects thriller, after a slow and cliched start. Filmmaker out to debunk UFO abductions gets more than he expected in the American southwest, but it winds…
Death On Scenic Drive
Serious swing and a miss here. Beautiful cinematography, and a nice analog synth soundtrack—overall reminischent of "Beyond The Black Rainbow" in those ways, including with lots of saturated lighting ond…
The Battery
Hmmmm. HMMMMMMM. Hmmmm. Here we have a seriously flawed gem. This is a "slice of life" zombie movie. Two ex-ballplayers wander around New England trying to survive after a zombie…
Torture Chamber
I think I might be the only person who thinks this is a good movie. This very Giallo-esque outing is about a severely scarred, burned kid with psychic powers who…
Salvage (2009)
The army descends on a cul-de-sac in suburban England and warns everybody to stay indoors for what initially seems to be a terrorist attack but turns out to be something…
Exeter (2015)
Slightly above-average "teen scream" flick that I just can't tell if it's supposed to be funny or it's just that over the top. They get into the action quickly as…
The Final
This bears a disclaimer. If I categorize a film as "je nais se quois", that doesn't necessarily constitute a recommendation that it should be watched. In this case, I absolutely…
Sweatshop
Like Charles Bukoswki made a horror movie. A bunch of punk rockers break into a warehouse or something to throw an underground rave. And have all kinds of sleazy sex…
Beware
Boy, if I was only going to watch one slasher flick in my life—and one is probably about my lifetime appetite for slasher flicks—this one might be it. Kids on…
Silent Panic
Surprisingly decent zero-budget indie drama that starts like it's going to be a crap thriller but slowly and smoothly transitions to something quieter and more thoughtful. Three friends' relationships with…
Feed The Devil
Kids get lost in the Alaskan woods looking for a pot patch and run afoul of... a Native American psychopath? A Native American spirit? Unsure, but it's Native American, and…
Fright Night
Caught this on Tubi about 40 years after having last seen it in the theaters and not remembering a thing about it (In fact, I'm not even sure I saw…
Don’t Break The Rules
This movie starts with a man slumped at the front gate of a cabin. An older man stands in front of him, watching him impassively, as he pleads, "I didn't…
All Eyes
This is a fun movie, in its way. I actually watched it twice because I forgot to review it the first time, but once I realized I recognized it, I…
The Arbors
Surprisingly alright creature feature. A young man finds an insect-like creature that bonds with him and begins killing people that stand in his way. I know, that doesn't sound very…
Eden Log
Putting this here so I remember to watch this one again. This came on via autoplay when something I was watching on Tubi ended and I was so distracted by…
The Changed
People are holed up in a suburban house as everyone outside is slowly "changed", taken over by an alien life form or some such—or, as it's described by the people…
Expulsion
It's too bad this movie is so poorly done because, because the writing is ambitious and despite a reliance on a lot of cliches it has a little bit of…
The Last Gateway
A young man's stomach pains turn out to be a portal to Hell opening in his abdomen from which demons periodically emerge, and he and his wife must run from…
Terror Firma
This is a truly odd little movie. Low-budget for sure, with only 3 actors, and hard to call it a very good movie, but, it's definitely a little different in…
Foil
Somewhere in the same universe as Repo Man, Harold & Kumar, and Buckaroo Bonzai is this quirky buddy comedy about two slacker friends on a UFO-spotting camping trip in the…
Removed
Definitely... well... not a flawed gem, but a flawed alright thriller in which a cleaner is paid to clean house for an overbearing rich guy. Saved from mediocrity by the…
The Devil’s Restaurant
A horror-comedy that actually works, sort of... at least well enough that I was reasonably entertained. In this case, a restauranteur strikes a deal with a demon who lives in…
The Lost End
This ambitious indie flick is somewhere in the David Lynch, Guillermo Del Toro, Gaspar Noe triangle of "film is art" highly-stylized productions. A man whose wife and son disappear on…
Caught (2017)
Hmmm. Hmmmmmmmm. Hmmmm. What starts as a dreadfully slow, very British take on a home invasion/captivity flick a la "Funny Games"—something I'm immediately put off by—turns out, very slowly, to…
Conjuring The Cult
A father whose daughter killed herself has a coven of witches resurrect her. But the plot of this movie doesn't matter. The whole movie is set apart by being an…