Hit&Run
Two things I can't stand: 1.) unbearably twee, self-consciously "quirky" comedies; and 2.) Tom Arnold being cast as anything other than the one white guy on the Soul Plane. I…
Don’t Be Afraid Of The Dark (2010 remake)
Any horror movie starring Katie Holmes is only going to be so good. This one has very decent creature effects, though. Guy Pearce (who appears to be completely featureless other…
Enemy
Jake Gyllenhaal as a guy who discovers an actor who looks just like him. They seduce each other's partners, then one of the women turns into a giant spider. Not…
Barbarians
Did we really need another movie like this? Uncomfortable dinner in the English countryside between two young couples with an obvious uncomfortable history gets increasingly uncomfortable until, in a stunningly…
Sharp Stick
godawful "indie"-flick-starring-major stars I got tricked into watching by Hulu billing it as a "comedy". This movie seems to desperately want to say something, but I have no idea what…
The Devil Wears Prada
Had opportunity to re-watch this, and you know, I like this movie. Not sure what I can say that hasn't already been said. Meryl Streep in an iconic performance she…
Stranger Things, Season 4 (series)
Eh, this is all getting a bit Harry Potter for me. The first season was cool. By season 4, they actually do a decent job of retconning an overarching narrative…
The Night House
Talk about a disappointment. For about 85% of its running length, this jump-out-and-say-boo ghost story about a young widow mourning her husband's recent suicide in the lake house he built…
American Carnage
Ridiculous, hamfisted, but a charismatic cast kind of save this ridiculous attempt at making a "Get Out" for Latinos. An emergency order results in the arrest of all children of…
Kalifornia
Just re-watched this movie, which I remembered as being pretty good, after many years. It's funny how different it plays in post-Trump America. It could almost be a parable. And…
The Immaculate Room
contrived set piece in which a young, insecure couple agrees to stay in an empty white room for 50 days for $5,000,000. Guess whether they last or not. Hint: in…
Cam
Madeline Brewer, who always seems to pick at least faintly interesting projects, in what could easily have been a slightly titillating Black Mirror episode, as a cam girl who finds…
Booksmart
"Superbad" as a TV movie with girls instead of guys. The two leads are genuinely likable and have real chemistry, and the humor is good, but the try-hard over-quirkiness, contrived…
Smile
Terrible horror movie. Like a teen scream, except stars adults. A doctor sees a deranged patient kill herself in front of her, inherits a curse that makes random jump scares…
Piercing
All style, zero substance. Apparently based on a novel, but I don't see more than a very short story's worth of plot here. A psychopath hires a prostitute played by…
What Keeps You Alive
Ok, slightly better than your average captivity/stalking in the back woods movie, but I don't know how much of that to chalk up to quality (usually totally lacking in this…
Cosmopolis
So, I'm watching this movie, which stars Robert Pattinson's teeny, tiny nose as the nose of a billionaire riding around New York taking meetings and having sex in his limo…
Your Pretty Face Is Going To Hell [tv series]
Ok, I love this show. I think this is a comedy central thing, they're like 10 or 15 minute videos, but they present a version of hell as a cubicle…
Black Summer [series]
Mom tries to cross zombie-infested Los Angeles to find her daughter. The Walking Dead, except with fast zombies instead of slow zombies, and any plot considerations totally replaced by people…
The Gift (2000)
Joe Dante in "workmanlike mainstream director" mode. A woman with psychic powers is drawn in to a murder trial and followup investigation in this dirtbag rural whodunit. I find it…
Dollface [tv series]
As Kat Dennings's likeability is to Jay Baruchel's, and Los Angeles is to Vancouver, so is Dollface to Man Seeking Woman. Which is to say, it's pretty good, entertaining enough.
Young Adult
A pleasant enough way to kill an hour and a half, with Charlize Theron as a gorgeous prom queen returned to her small home town to reclaim her gorgeous prom…
The Green Inferno
Eli Roth, once again showing his ability to waste his more than adequate filmmaking skills on torture porn the sake of nothing but torture porn, technically well-done but with nothing…
Depraved
Unfortunate title aside, this little gem is "Frankenstein" retold as a modern hipster indie film, in the best possible way, without the least bit of irony, as a brilliant medic…
Death House
I'm generally not a fan of "so bad it's good" films, but, my god. Except for the White Zombie-sounding tracks in the otherwise analog synth soundtrack, this 2017 film is…
Don’t Knock Twice
What promises to be a total crap thriller about a young girl being pursued by a supernatural force after a "Bloody Mary"-type teenagers-foolishly-test-a-superstition-that-turns-out-to-be-true incident actually turns out to be a…
The Congress
Robin Wright in a 1/3-live action, 2/3-animated film about, um, I'm not really sure. Something about actors being digitized, and then about people taking chemicals made by the movie studios…
Into The Dark “I’m Just Fucking With You”
Not a favorite of mine but worth an honorable mention. Pretty much nonstop fun for a uniformly bad movie, in thanks to a particularly hatable protagonist who you want to…